


I'm An Idol

by KimJongDaeddy



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Abstract, Freeform, Other, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-30 16:26:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17832053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KimJongDaeddy/pseuds/KimJongDaeddy
Summary: An abstract poem about idol life, more specifically Junmyeon's idol life.





	I'm An Idol

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this cause I was listening to depressing songs without any sleep for 24 hours and idol life is something I constantly think about. This IS an abstract/freeform poem so if you're not a stuck up prude like me then you won't be into this stuff so if you come out of this like "What the hell was that?" just remember I warned you asdfgh

“I’m an idol.”  
Junmyeon had declared.

 

Eat. Dance. Sing. Sleep.  
Eat. Dance. Sing. Sleep.  
Eat. Dance. Sing. Sleep.

 

Junmyeon’s days, every day it was: eat, dance, sing, sleep.  
He was an idol, it’s what he had to do, it’s what he signed up for.  
So he did.  
He ate, he danced, he sung and he slept.

 

Idol life, it’s the idol life.

 

Being the leader, of course, meant more responsibilities.

It was difficult at the start; the beginning is always the hardest part. But you push, you push, push, push until you’re no longer at the beginning, until you’re no longer at the start.

 

He could manage, he now knew how to manage.

 

Baekhyun, Jongdae, and Minseok had a concert schedule. He’d sent them off.  
Sehun had to film for a game show. Easy to remember.  
Jongin had modeling, yup, off he goes.  
Kyungsoo was off early, off to film for another movie. Simple.  
Chanyeol had a fan event soon, he had to prepare for that. It was his birthday event, Junmyeon would definitely go.  
Yixing was in China, still promoting on his own. In the back of Junmyeon’s mind but still there to remember.

 

Yes, it was easy, he wasn’t at the beginning anymore. Everything, he had been trained for, he knew what to do. This was idol life – leader life – easy to do.

 

Eat. Dance. Sing. Sleep.  
Eat. Dance. Sing. Sleep.  
Eat. Dance. Sing. Sleep.

Wash, rinse, repeat.

There was a concert coming up, had to prepare for that.  
Eat. Dance. Sing. Sleep.  
An album, their album still needed to be recorded. Need to get that done.  
Eat. Dance. Sing. Sleep.  
The concert, cancelled? No, it was still on? Still preparing? Okay, still preparing.  
Eat. Dance. Sing and Sleep.  
The album – no – a mini album? Repackage? Either way, Junmyeon had to record.  
Eat. Sing. Dance. Sleep.  
Oh his musical, he had a musical, he had to do that. No, was it finished? The album, did it still need recording?

 

Sing. Eat-  
Wait.  
Dance.  
No.

 

Sleep?

 

Junmyeon knew what to do, he wasn’t at the beginning. Everything he could manage, he knew how to manage.

 

Baekhyun, Jongdae, and Minseok had a schedule. They had to do that, had to go to that, yes.  
Sehun had to film; for a show. What show? Junmyeon didn’t know, he should know, but there’s no time.  
Jongin – what was it – modelling? Yes, that’s what the books said, what his messy handwriting said.  
Kyungsoo was…where? Dammit, he always had something. Probably gone already; that’s okay, it’s okay.  
Chanyeol, some event. A fan event? What was it? No, Junmyeon would remember, wouldn’t he? Shit.  
Yixing was gone, still gone. When would he come back? Oh lord, he didn’t know. Where was he?

 

His head. Hurt.

One needed – to go.

  * Eat
  * Dance
  * Sing



Now there was time, time to manage.

Eat. Dance. Sing.  
Oh, the company says to manage? Manage. He can manage.  
Eat. Dance. Sing.  
Oh, the company will no longer cooperate? It’s okay, he can fix it.  
Eat. Dance. Sing.  
Oh, the company has abandoned.

 

He’s been abandoned.

 

So tired.  
Another needs to go.

  * Dance
  * Sing



That’s all he had to do, then he could manage.

 

Junmyeon, he doesn’t need the company’s help.  
EXO, they don’t need the company’s management.  
They’ve got Junmyeon.

 

Junmyeon.

 

Dance. Sing.

Dance. Sing.

Dance! Sing!

Dance! Sing!

_Dance! Sing!_

_Dance! Sing!_

**_DANCE! SING!_ **

**_DANCE! SING!_ **

**_DANCE!_ **

**_SING!_ **

**_D A N C E_ **

**_S I N G_ **

 

 

Please.

 

He’s so tired.

 

Idol life-  
No.  
Idol limbo.

 

His body, it hurt.  
His eyes, they were heavy.  
His willpower, it was gone.

 

He can’t. He can’t. He can’t.

 

Junmyeon’s breathing was heavy, sporadic. The dark room lit by only a lamp. Upon looking up, he saw a mirror, he saw himself.

His heart, **crushed**.  
His soul, _exhausted_.  
His mind,  s c a t t e r e d.

 

Junmyeon sobbed, using any energy he had left, he let his head drop and sobbed and sobbed. But with tear blurred vision, he slowly looked back up at the mirror, wailing at what looked back.

 

With a cry, Junmyeon affirmed:

 

“I’m An Idol.”


End file.
